Tuesday, August 26, 2014

Thoughts Written

I don't know how do I feel
Deep inside
It's crawling up to my skin
But not into my mind yet
I'm actually depressed right now. 
Perhaps when I wrote this alone in a dark room
I will feel it.
I'm so stupid to allow myself to feel it.
Do people hear my problems?
I question this every single time.
But my mind in clouded with a lot of shit.
Even I myself don't listen.
I don't even know my source of sadness and my happiness anymore
Perhaps I just put a mask on.
Wear it and act it.
But at the end of the day it's back to me feeling like shit all day.
It's overbearing, sad, depressing, anxiety at all figure.
I want to just let go of this burden.
I'm sick of the pretentious me.
I'm sick of myself.
I'm sick of just being sad.
It's always you are thinking so much.
Saying it will be fine,
Saying it will be okay.
But at the end of the day, talk is easy 
But nonetheless everyone forgets that 
Action speak louder than words.
Easy to said but not easy to be done.
I don't know how much longer I can bear this
I don't know if I'm even lost at the blank edge.
I need escape, screw it I want escape.
Still can't achieve it myself.
Cause it's a stereotypical world that needed achievers
Why they can't see that most teenage are not happy.
Fuck studies. I'm tired and I'm done
I'm just so sick of everything.
I'm just drowning and the worst part...
I'm losing me.



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